So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize