I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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