Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Less talking, more tequila
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize