member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
