I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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