i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
