it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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