just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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