His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
