i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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