He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
