I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
