No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
