So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
