I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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