I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
The adults are the big ones right?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
