If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
