My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
