Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize