he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
did you just send me my own nude
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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