I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Randomize
