Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
