Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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