By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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