Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
