i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize