brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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