It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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