I have demons in me.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
