Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize