My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
