Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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