I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
He passed out mid-signature
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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