Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
he puts the penis in happiness.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize