i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
