My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
