AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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