One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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