I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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