lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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