woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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