she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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