what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
