Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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