you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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