How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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