He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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