dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
