When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
