There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Terrible idea I love it
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
